One of the ways you learn about life is to associate with people.
Why do men like intelligent women? Because opposites attract.
Women want to be treated as equals, not sequels.
Home is where the heartache is.
If the Nobel Prize was awarded by a woman, it would go to the inventor of the dimmer switch.
dealing with loss and heartache doesn't make you stronger. It only makes people think you are.
I speak as your native guide to the mysterious tribe called the English. Dress code is everything. You can be a card-carrying Nazi, you can pay gigolos to eat gnocchi out of your navel and you won't be pilloried -- as long as you never, ever wear linen with tweed.
The only time I get sick of making people laugh is when I'm in a non-writing-joke mode, and I just can't seem to come up with anything new that's funny. That's a tough place to be as a comedian.
I guess I kind of realized that my whole life isn’t one giant press junket. I don’t have to be smiling all the time and always have the perfect answer.
Always be your husband's best friend, make him laugh and give him a little bit of freedom - you can't suffocate him.
If you need a baby that bad, go down to the pound and get one. Not even a baby - go get an old man. There's unwanted people of all ages, pre-made and waiting for you.