A tree's a tree. How many more do you need to look at?
What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and he told me about the butcher and my wife.
My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.
We learned sexual technique from our dog. He taught how to beg, and he taught my wife how to roll over and play dead.
You know you're ugly when you go to the proctologist and he sticks his finger in your mouth.
When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.
My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves.
Safety is a fence, and fences are for sheep. I would rather die at twenty-two, knowing the truth, then live in a cage of lies for a hundred years.
Wanting to do one thing can require that you take on other interests.
You can try on our suede underwear if you choose. Do what you want, but don't step on my blue suede shoes.
If our church is not marked by caring for the poor, the oppressed, the hungry, we are guilty of heresy.