Same topic Authors
Quote of the day

Once you assume your right to interfere in other people's problems they become in some ways more of a worry than your own, for with your own you can at least do what you think best, but other people always show such a persistent tendency to do the wrong thing.

Popular Topics
Quiet, Impossible, Confidence, Smile, Air, Things, Lives, Good, Today, I Like You, Love, Afternoon, Weak, Difference, Beauty, Journey, Perfect Love, Life, Kindly, Justice, Achievement, Light, Music, Poet, Success, Movie Love, Name, Passive, Kind, I Miss You, Love You, Culture, Important, Thank You, Enthusiast, Organization, Loves, Path Of Love, Things In Life, Diamond, Dress, Period, Excellent, Education, Ideas, Gold, Life Is Like, Live, Ocean, America
Jim Gaffigan

You think Jesus ever tried to talk God out of some of that stuff? 'Instead of that whole crucifixion, how about we do a big fundraiser!'

Big, Crucifixion, Jesus, Stuff, Think, Thinking
Same Author Quotes

My kids are always awake. It's they're taking shifts. 'Alright, I'll annoy 'em from midnight to. Who wants to ?'

Annoy, Ems, Kids, Midnight, Taking

After you eat a Hot Pocket, Everything will taste like rubber for a month!

Everything, Funny, Hot, Like, Pockets, Taste

I do kind of aspire to do comedy that appeals to a wide range of audiences and doesn't divide people. I never want to do material that makes people laugh at the expense of making other people feel bad - not to say I'm not guilty of that at times. . . . I try and make humor out of the really important issues of the day, like Hot Pockets and elevators and not wanting to get out of bed.

Issues, Laughing, Material, People, Wanting

I married a woman who loves to camp, and I am what you would call "indoorsy". . . My wife always brings up, "Camping's a tradition in my family. " Hey, it was a tradition in everyone's family 'til we came up with the house.

Call, Camping, House, Loves, Married, Wife

I don't know what's more exhausting about parenting: the getting up early, or acting like you know what you're doing.

Acting, Exhausting, Know, Like You, Parenting, Up Early
Similar Quotes