Jews don't drink much because it interferes with their suffering. - Milton Berle

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Quote of the day

We are not responsible for every thought that goes wandering through our mind. We are, however, responsible for the ones we hold there. We're especially responsible for the one's we put there.

Milton Berle

Jews don't drink much because it interferes with their suffering.

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A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours.

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This man's wife told him, "For Christmas, surprise me. " On Christmas Eve he leaned over where she was sleeping and said, "Boo!"

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A man is hit by a car while crossing a Beverly Hills street. A woman rushes to him and cradles his head in her lap, asking, Are you comfortable? The man answers, I make a nice living.

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For every studen with a spark of brilliance, there are about ten with ignition trouble.

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When I was in school, one of my teachers was crazy about me. I once heard her tell another teacher, "I wish he was my kid for one day!"

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