Everyone just wants to hear the exact jokes that apply to them and want to - everyone wants a perfectly crafted joke for them.
I don't suppose God laughs at the people who think He doesn't exist. He's above jokes. But the devil isn't. That's one of his most endearing qualities.
There was always another side to a joke, the side of the victim.
I tell jokes to pay my green fees.
A joke isn't yours. It's used and you don't know where it's been.
It will startle you to see what slaves we are to by-gone times-to Death, if we give the matter the right word!. . . We read in Dead Men's books! We laugh at Dead Men's jokes, and cry at Dead Men's pathos!. . . Whatever we seek to do, of our own free motion, a Dead Man's icy hand obstructs us!
I'd always been scared of people with tertiary education and high intellects in case they found me wanting. I thought they viewed me as just a welder who knew a few jokes.
I had a healthy curiosity and would try things on - play lots of practical jokes. But it was more in my head - fantasies of "What would happen if. . . ? Like what would happen in class if you took all your clothes off and you ran around the room?
I joke sometimes that I live a protracted adolescence, that a part of me will always be twelve years old.
You make a joke out of everything. Life’s too painful not to.
If you find you are not understanding my explaination for a joke, hit F5 on your browser and the page will refresh and I will explain it again.
sarcasm and jokes were often the bottle in which clinical depressives sent out their most plangent screams for someone to care and help them.
For me, I'm a fan of really dark, depressing stuff. Even something like The Wire, which can be hugely depressing and really serious, the bits I always remember are the jokes, you know?
I don't approve of political jokes; I have seen too many of them get elected.
Being a military child, we moved a lot and we developed different vernaculars from moving from the south, to the Midwest, and seeing the world. Going from New York to California and from Jamaica Queens to the South, I was always the new kid, or had the army crew haircut. I expected people to pick up on me. My brother kinda stole all of my old jokes. He got his inspiration from me.
Living is a pretty grim joke, but a joke just the same.
I'm not really very funny, I just keep recycling jokes.
I'm a joke comic. I tell jokes.
I tell very mean jokes.
Anything where we're the butt of the joke, no one tells us about it.