Same topic Authors
Quote of the day

Thomas Jefferson made a comment about the Presidency and age. He said that one should not worry about one's exact chronological age in reference to his ability to perform one's task. And ever since he told me that, I stopped worrying.

Popular Topics
Enthusiast, Life Is Good, Leadership, Guru, Willing, Mother'S Day, Inspiration, Dress, Body, Kindly, Quiet, Beach, Dance, Air, I Miss You, Bible, Inspirational Life, House, Subject, Peace Love, Surprised, Justice, Humble, Hip Hop, Good, Wonder, Gossip, Diamond, Creative, Motor, Night, Amazing Music, Gold, Funny, Confidence, Hope, Scholar, Thing, Life, Talent, Weak, Faith, America, Girl, Perfect Love, Kindness, Movie Love, English, I Like You, Light
Jim Gaffigan

I recently bought extreme chunky peanut butter. I opened it up. . . it was just peanuts. Wow that is extreme!

Butter, Chunky, Peanut Butter, Peanuts, Wow
Same Author Quotes

My kids are always awake. It's they're taking shifts. 'Alright, I'll annoy 'em from midnight to. Who wants to ?'

Annoy, Ems, Kids, Midnight, Taking

After you eat a Hot Pocket, Everything will taste like rubber for a month!

Everything, Funny, Hot, Like, Pockets, Taste

I do kind of aspire to do comedy that appeals to a wide range of audiences and doesn't divide people. I never want to do material that makes people laugh at the expense of making other people feel bad - not to say I'm not guilty of that at times. . . . I try and make humor out of the really important issues of the day, like Hot Pockets and elevators and not wanting to get out of bed.

Issues, Laughing, Material, People, Wanting

I married a woman who loves to camp, and I am what you would call "indoorsy". . . My wife always brings up, "Camping's a tradition in my family. " Hey, it was a tradition in everyone's family 'til we came up with the house.

Call, Camping, House, Loves, Married, Wife

I don't know what's more exhausting about parenting: the getting up early, or acting like you know what you're doing.

Acting, Exhausting, Know, Like You, Parenting, Up Early
Similar Quotes