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100% of the people who get the magazine say they read the cartoons first - and the other 2% are lying. 100

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Conan O'Brien

Playboy magazine announced that they are going to support the troops by sending them emails from Playboy playmates. After hearing this the U. S. troops said 'Just our luck, we get emails from playmates, but we're embedded with Geraldo. '

Email, Emails, Luck, Playboy, Support
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A new study reveals that one-third of babies in the U. S. have used a smartphone. Yeah, and one-third of babies in China have MADE a smartphone.

Baby, China, Smartphone, Smartphones, Study, Yeah

Fall down. Make a mess. Break something occasionally. Know that your mistakes are your own unique way of getting to where you need to be. And remember that the story is never over.

Fall, Mess, Mistake, Story, Unique

Marco Rubio announced he's running for president. Fun fact: Marco Rubio's wife is a former Miami Dolphins cheerleader. In other words, she knows how to generate fake enthusiasm for someone who's not going to win.

Enthusiasm, Fun, Rubio, Running, Winning

Link Wray is the all-time legend.

Guitar, Legend, Legends, Link, Links, Wray

Apparently Arnold was inspired by President Bush, who proved you can be a successful politician in this country even if English is your second language.

Country, English, Inspired, President, Successful
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