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Happy endings were never handed out. You had to fight for them, earn them with bruised hearts and sacrifices.

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Les Dawson

The mother-in-law came round last week. It was absolutely pouring down. So I opened the door and I saw her there and I said, 'Mother, don't just stand there in the rain. Go home. '

Door, Home, Mother, Rain, Said, Saw
Same Author Quotes

The mother-in-law had an accident at work. A hot rivet dropped down her drawers and she fell off the oil rig.

Down, Fell, Law, Mother, Oil

Everyone has a family tree; the Dawsons have one, it's a weeping willow.

Everyone, Family, Tree, Weeping Willows

I'd like to thank the BBC for allowing me to work here. And I'd like to thank the wife and kids for making it necessary.

Allowing, Bbc, Kids, Like, Thank, Wife

I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own.

Funny, Furniture, Hilarious, Life, Sell, Trouble

I took my mother-in-law to Madame Tussaud's Chamber of Horrors, and one of the attendants said: 'Keep her moving sir; we're stock-taking. '

Chamber, Law, Madame, Mother, Moving, Sir
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