Same topic Authors
Quote of the day

If you do something extraordinary for your customer you will never be forgotten. Customer service heroes get remembered, but legends never die.

Popular Topics
Dress, Beauty, Reality, Feeling, Dream, Culture, Thank You, America, Path Of Love, Fitness, Excellent, Positive, Subject, Success, Stage, Think, Air, Job, Heart, Afternoon, Home, Secret, Songs, Looking For Love, New York, Kindly, Education, Passive, Inspiring, Important, Night, Involve, Quiet, Soccer, Hope, Poor, Love You, Talent, Quite, Light, Faith, Nice, Jesus, Beach, Angry, Glory, Knowledge, Inspired, Impossible, Willing
Anthony Jeselnik

I like the idea of being the funny guy in the dramatic thing, playing a hit man with a weird sense of humor.

Guy, Hit, Idea, Ideas, Men, Playing
Same Author Quotes

People say it's easy to make fun of retarded people, but it's not. You really have to explain it to them.

Explain, Fun, People, Retarded, Say

My girlfriend is upset about her new haircut. I don't understand why she's crying. I'm the one who has to get a new girlfriend.

Cry, Girlfriend, Haircut, Upset

I've got a kid in Africa that I feed, that I clothe, that I school, that I inoculate for 75 cents a day. Which is practically nothing compared to what it cost to send him there.

Clothe, Day, Funny, Humor, School

My ex-girlfriend owned a parakeet…oh my god, that f**king thing would never shut up. But the bird was cool.

Bird, Cool, Girlfriend, God, Kings, Owned

About a month ago some kids in my neighborhood were playing hide-and-go-seek and one of them ended up in an abandoned refrigerator. It's all anybody talked about for weeks. I said, 'Who cares? How many kids you know get to die a winner?

Cares, Die, Kids, Know, Months, Who Cares
Similar Quotes