Be strong! Don't talk of ghosts and devils.
What do Japanese Jews love to eat? Hebrew National Tsunami.
I understand being less sexy than Osama bin Laden, but not less sexy than Carrot Top. That, I find offensive.
I think of Alan Thicke as Perry Como without the excitement.
I'd like to have a kid, but I'd probably get a Frank Sinatra Jr. instead of a Gilbert Gottfried Jr. I'd totally screw up like that.
Japan is really advanced. They don't go to the beach. The beach comes to them.
I don't know if I change my act from century to century. Sometimes I'm onstage doing imitations and references to people who have been dead for 50 years.
The Scripture was written to shew unto men the kingdom of God; and to prepare their minds to become his obedient subjects; leavingthe world, and the Philosophy thereof, to the disputation of men, for the exercising of their natural Reason.
For each glass, liberally large, the basic ingredients begin with ice cubes in a shaker and three or four drops of Angostura bitters on the ice cubes. Add several twisted lemon peels to the shaker, then a bottle-top of dry vermouth, a bottle-top of Scotch, and multiply the resultant liquid content by five with gin, preferably Bombay Sapphire. Add more gin if you think it is too bland. . . I have been told, but have no personal proof that it is true, that three of these taken in the course of an evening make it possible to fly from New York to Paris without an airplane.
Beauty: "You called me beautiful last night. " Beast: "You do not believe me then?" Beauty: "Well - no. Any number of mirrors have told me otherwise. " Beast: "You will find no mirrors here, for I cannot bear them: nor any quiet water in ponds. And since I am the only one who sees you, why are you not then beautiful?
If the infinite had no me, then me would be its limit. It would not be the infinite, therefore it would not be.