I totally wouldn't mind being able to wave my hand head to toe and have, like, a whole new outfit.
Hollywood always wanted me to be pretty, but I fought for realism.
It's better to be hated for who you are, than to be loved for someone you're not. It's a sign of your worth sometimes, if you're hated by the right people.
You should never say bad things about the dead, you should only say good. . . Joan Crawford is dead. Good.
[On gay men:] Let me say, a more artistic, appreciative group of people for the arts does not exist. . . They are more knowledgeable, more loving of the arts. They make the average male look stupid.
At 50, I thought proudly: Here we are, half century! Being 60 was fairly frightening. You want to know how I spent my 70th birthday? I put on a completely black face, a fuzzy black Afro wig, wore black clothes and hung a black wreath on my door.
If you want a thing done well, get a couple of old broads to do it.
My wife loves Europe, but to me it's a bad day at a theme park.
The fun you get from golf is in direct ratio to the effort you don't put into it.
It was hard to reassure grown-ups when you weren't certain yourself what you were feeling and thinking—when thoughts dissolved before you could name them.
For the more a man limits himself, the nearer he is on the other hand to what is limitless; it is precisely those who are apparently aloof from the world who build for themselves a remarkable and thoroughly individual world in miniature, using their own special equipment, termit-like.