I'm kind of lame. I prefer quiet evenings at home, hanging out with my family.
The funniest line in English is 'Get it?' When you say that, everyone chortles.
I think if the church put in half the time on covetousness that it does on lust, this would be a better world for all of us.
A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.
Intelligence is like four-wheel drive. It only allows you to get stuck in more remote places.
Even in a time of elephantine vanity and greed, one never has to look far to see the campfires of gentle people.
God writes a lot of comedy. . . the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny.
To instruct the mass of our citizens in these, their rights, interests and duties, as men and citizens. . . this brings us to the point at which are to commence the higher branches of education. . . . To develop the reasoning faculties of our youth, enlarge their minds, cultivate their morals, and instill into them the precepts of virtue and order.
Every moment has infinite potential. Every new moment contains for you possibilities that you can't possibly imagine. Every day is a blank page that you could fill with the most beautiful drawings.
Why do you go away? So that you can come back. So that you can see the place you came from with new eyes and extra colors. And the people there see you differently, too. Coming back to where you started is not the same as never leaving.
Stay strong! Your test will become your test-imony, your mess will become your mess-age.