If you can delude yourself by believing that there is some kind of Santa Claus out there who … - Woody Allen

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The thing that interests me is the good and evil in everybody. I don't have conventional heroes in the films that I directed, because I believe there's good and evil in everybody.

Woody Allen

If you can delude yourself by believing that there is some kind of Santa Claus out there who is going to bail you out in the end, then it will help you get through. Even if you are proven wrong in the end, you would have had a better life than a non-believer.

Bail, Believe, Claus, Help, Life, Santa

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Eighty percent of success is showing up.

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Even if God exists, he's done such a terrible job, it's a wonder people don't get together and file a class action suit against him.

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Until you've been kissed on a rainy Parisian afternoon - you've never been kissed.

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Bisexuality doubles your chances of a date on a Saturday night. I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it's fantastic. If there is reincarnation, I'd like to come back as Warren Beatty's fingertips. I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own. My love life is terrible. The last time I was inside a woman was when I visited the Statue of Liberty. Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it's a pretty good one.

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