To feel keenly the poetry of a morning's roses, one has to have just escaped from the claws of this vulture which we call sickness.
Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines.
Tourists - have some fun with New york's hard-boiled cabbies. When you get to your destination, say to your driver, "Pay? I was hitchhiking. "
George Clooney is on the program tonight. Next week at this time I will be in a hardware store watching them mix paint.
People say New Yorkers can't get along. Not true. I saw two New Yorkers, complete strangers, sharing a cab. One guy took the tires and the radio; the other guy took the engine.
I mean you think about the guy, the Nigerian guy, who was going to blow up the plane. He was wearing a pair of Fruit of the Lunatic. . . . Guy was not too bright. He said that the reason he became a suicide bomber was to work his way up in the al Qaeda organization.
There's no business like show business, but there are several businesses like accounting.
Let's suppose somebody abused you sexually. You still had a choice, though not a good one, about what to tell yourself about the abuse.
Whether we will philosophize or we won't philosophize, we must philosophize.
Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door.
No matter how skillful you are, you can't invent a product advantage that doesn't exist. And if you do, and it's just a gimmick, it's going to fall apart anyway.