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You were at the age where you could fall in love with a girl over an expression, over a gesture. That's what happened with your girlfriend, Paloma- she stooped to pick up her purse and your heart flew out of you.

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Dave Barry

Nobody is excused from the excellence trend. Babies are not excused. Starting right after they get out of the womb, modern babies are exposed to instructional flashcards designed to make them the best babies they can possibly be, so they can get into today's competitive preschools. Your eighties baby sees so many flashcards that he never gets an unobstructed view of his parents' faces. As an adult, he'll carry around a little wallet card that says "7x9=63," because it will remind him of mother.

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Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

Ark, Education, Lone, Professionals, Trying

Take the folks at Coca-Cola. For many years, they were content to sit back and make the same old carbonated beverage. It was a good beverage, no question about it; generations of people had grown up drinking it and doing the experiment in sixth grade where you put a nail into a glass of Coke and after a couple of days the nail dissolves and the teacher says: Imagine what it does to your TEETH! So Coca-Cola was solidly entrenched in the market, and the management saw no need to improve.

Couple, Glass, Humorous, Question, Saw, Teacher

Scientists tell us that the fastest animal in the world, with a speed of 120 mph, is a cow dropped out of a helicopter.

120, Animal, Cow, Fastest, Mph, Science

A perfect parent is a person with excellent child-rearing theories and no actual children.

Actual, Children, Inspirational, Parent, Perfect, Perfect Parents

Your hand and your mouth agreed many years ago that, as far as chocolate is concerned, there is no need to involve your brain.

Brain, Chocolate, Hands, Mouth, Years, Yummy
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