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Madame Lily Devalier always asked "Where are you?" in a way that insinuated that there were only two places on earth one could be: New Orleans and somewhere ridiculous.

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Maria Bamford

Here's the Middle East. Here's the mosque, here's the church, open the temple, everybody's MAD!

Mad, Church, Middle East, Mosque, Middle
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If you're ever if you're ever thinking, “Oh, but I'm a waste of space and I'm a burden,” remember: that also describes the Grand Canyon. Why don't you have friends and family take pictures of you from a safe distance? Revel in your majestic profile?

Distance, Family, Friends, Inspirational, Pictures, Thinking

My therapist says I'm afraid of success. I guess I could understand that, because after all, fulfilling my potential would REALLY cut into my sitting-around time

Cut, Cutting, Potential, Says, Sitting, Therapists

Get out of your house and go see some live performance, for God's sake. There are people creating things just outside your window.

Creating Things, Fun, People, Sake, See, Things

I can't stand makeup commercials. 'Do you need a lipstick that keeps your lips kissable?' No, I need a lipstick that gets me equal pay for equal work. How about an eye shadow that makes me stop thinking I'm too fat?

Eye, Gets, Makeup, Shadow, Stop, Thinking

If you stay alive for no other reason do it for spite

Alive, Reason, Spite, Stay
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