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I went through a phase when I was 13 where I would only fall in love with people over the age of 19 or 20. I never had a real relationship with any of these people, but it was definitely the guy I wanted to hang out with and wanted to go on trips with. I would be like, 'But, Daddy, he's a musician!'.

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Alan King

Comedy is an amazing calling. Once you get that first laugh, it's hard to turn away. Then, of course, you're hooked and you have to learn how to survive in the business.

Calling, Firsts, Hard, Laughing, Learn, Turn
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Marriage is nature's way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.

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Let's face it: It's difficult enough to be funny without worrying about what is going to offend whom.

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We get the worrywart, the hypochondriac, the money-grubbing miser, the intractable negotiator. . . Some would say certain of these refer to the stereotypical, or 'stage' Jew. But objectively speaking, the only crime in humor is an unfunny joke.

Certain, Crime, Humor, Stage, Stereotypical

If you want to read about love and marriage, you've got to buy two separate books.

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A summary of every Jewish holiday: They tried to kill us, we won, let's eat!

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