I have had three masters, Nature, Velasquez, and Rembrandt.
Checkers taught me that a King is a man with another man on top of him. But life taught me that that's actually called a Queen.
Never be less interesting than your refrigerator magnets.
I wonder what the most intelligent thing ever said was that started with the word 'dude. ' 'Dude, these are isotopes. ' 'Dude, we removed your kidney. You're gonna be fine. ' 'Dude, I am so stoked to win this Nobel Prize. I just wanna thank Kevin, and Turtle, and all my homies. '
My plumbing is all screwed up. Because it turns out, I do not own a garbage disposal.
I wish I lived next to Carnegie Hall. Then, if someone asked me how to get to my house, I would just say 'Practice, practice, practice, and then take a left. '
Now I got a time machine at home. It only goes foreword at regular speed. It's essentially a cardboard box and on the outside I wrote time machine in sharpie.
Commenting on the decisions of the Bowl Alliance regarding WAC teams: It's a step, no question. Obviously, it's not what any of us wanted, but it's at least a step. We can now say we're part of the Alliance. However, I hope it's not perceived that they bought us off and we're going to go away. It's not fair. It's not right; we still need to fight. We can't let them go away and hide. Other schools are taking a major share of the pot, and that's still a major sore point as far as I'm concerned. But at least this is a step, and better than what we had in the past.
There is no disguise which can hide love for long where it exists, or simulate it where it does not.
Making movies is never going to get better than working on a Coen brothers project.
I don't know what to say, except it's Christmas and we're all in misery.