Pain doesnt have a face and pain doesnt have a certain way of adjusting. Pain is universal.
Normally you have news, weather and travel. . . . . but not on snow day, on snow day news is weather is travel.
I've got a little baby, I made him. . . He doesn't speak, he's 2. . . He's a slow learner, he's only got 2 words. . . car and map. . . I'm slightly worried he's trying to escape. If his next word is passport we are in serious trouble!
My wife and I both made a list of 5 people we could sleep with. . . she read hers out and there were no surprises. . . 1 George Clooney. . . 2 Brad Pitt etc. . . I thought 'Ive got the better deal here'. . . 1 Your sister
There are only two conditions where you’re allowed to wake up a woman on a lie-in: it’s snowing or the death of a celebrity.
They had to ask spain I think, they've had to say to Spain, can you lend us some stuff for the roads, and it's Gordon Brown phoning up going 'pass the salt'
I'm glad Carol Vorderman has left Countdown, I mean it's not like she did much. She was effectively just an autistic shelf-stacker.
Adam does most of the work when it comes to videos and he basically does the same as I do with the lyrics. The videos are his visual interpretations of our music.
We live in a world where unfortunately the distinction between true and false appears to become increasingly blurred by manipulation of facts, by exploitation of uncritical minds, and by the pollution of the language.
I don't think I've ever been face to face with pure evil, so I don't think I've ever seen it with my own eyes. But I do understand human frailty and I do understand the capacity of people to be intermittently noble and virtuous and fallible.
Show me a satisfied man, and I'll show you a failure.