It is always the latest song that an audience applauds the most.
I loved feeling special. I hated feeling special.
I think if the church put in half the time on covetousness that it does on lust, this would be a better world for all of us.
A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.
Intelligence is like four-wheel drive. It only allows you to get stuck in more remote places.
Even in a time of elephantine vanity and greed, one never has to look far to see the campfires of gentle people.
God writes a lot of comedy. . . the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny.
Barbershop conversations are irrefutable proof that heads exist for the sake of hair.
Man is that guy ripped. I mean, I've got the washboard stomach, too. It's just that mine has about two months of laundry on top of it.
There can be powerful magic in acts of desperation.
It doesn't do Costco any good if nobody can afford to buy anything.