The librarian, the warrior, the free spirit. . . archetypes are a great jumping off point to help clarify where we want to go with a character.
I lost relatives to AIDS, a couple of my closest cousins. I lost friends to AIDS, high-school friends who never even made it to their 21st birthdays in the '80s. When it's that close to you, you can't really deny it, and you can't run from it.