If, after hearing my songs, just one human being is inspired to say something nasty to a friend, … - Tom Lehrer

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Dogma is a defensive reaction against doubt in the mind of the theorist, but doubt of which he is unaware.

Tom Lehrer

If, after hearing my songs, just one human being is inspired to say something nasty to a friend, or perhaps to strike a loved one, it will all have been worth the while.

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Once the rockets are up, who cares where they come down ? That's not my department.

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Life is like a piano. What you get out of it depends on how you play it.

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Angels we have heard on High Tell us to go out and Buy.

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The Lord's our shepherd, says the psalm. But just in case, we better get a bomb.

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When correctly viewed, everything is lewd.

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