I'm celebrating my love for you with a pint of beer and a new tattoo
Across the troubled maelstrom of time, people always need a beer.
Why should I paint dead fish, onions and beer glasses? Girls are so much prettier.
I want to go to a place where I can go to a football game, take off my shirt, paint my chest and major in beer.
A theater without beer is just a museum
I find the only thing that really stands up, better than gambling, better than booze, better than women, is reading.
Listen, you don't know any better so I'll just tell you. You can't try to save money by not having the right beer. You know, you can skip having medical insurance, you can buy everything you own at a swap meet but the right beer is what makes living like this possible.
I am very picky about my people and my beer.
Reading is sometimes an ingenious device for avoiding thought.
The man who called it "near beer" was a bad judge of distance.
Everybody thinks I drink beer but I actually like cider!
Drunkenness does not create vice; it merely brings it into view.
If you want someone to grab a beer with, I may not be that guy. But if you want someone to drive you home, I will get the job done and I will get you home.
Why was I born with such contemporaries?
It's hard to have any moral authority over a group of drunken college students when you have never had a beer and never been laid.
See, there's a fat guy doing okay. Bring me another beer.
Put it back in the horse!
Black music has become a commercial commodity. Live performances are not so accessible as they were previously. It use to be possible to go to the bar on the corner and hear music. It was available for a fifteen cent beer.
In recent years, perhaps encouraged by competition from McDonald's, the British hamburger has become a credit to the nation. At the time of which I speak, it looked like a scorched beer-coaster or a tenderized disc brake.
So, I went to Germany and ended up parasailing around this castle. I was in Germany sightseeing, eating Bratwurst and hanging out in beer gardens. And then, I got back from Germany and got a call where they were like, "We need to fly you to New York tomorrow to read with Taylor [Schilling]. " I was like, "Wait, for Alex, the manipulative drug-smuggling lesbian girl?!," and they were like, "Yeah. "