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If something is boring after two minutes, try it for four. If still boring, then eight. Then sixteen. Then thirty-two. Eventually one discovers that it is not boring at all.

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Carlos Mencia

When women can't climax, it's our fault, but when we can't get an erection, we have to go to the doctor.

Climax, Doctor, Doctors, Erection, Faults
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When it comes to my daughter, I'm a conservative. But when it comes to your daughter, I'm a liberal!

Conservative, Daughter, Liberal, My Daughter

Listen, here's my questions to anybody when they talk about comedy. When you are with your friends who don't judge you, what do you say? And if that's appropriate to say with your friends, why is it not appropriate anywhere else. Like I hate those people who judge me and are hypocrites.

Hate, Hypocrite, People, Comedy, Questions, Judge

When I was young and didn't have money, I liked gambling because winning and losing was fun for the rush of it. The amount of money that I would have to put down now to get that rush, there is no f'ing way I'm going to do it. It's just stupid. I would rather get that rush some other way.

Fun, Liked, Losing, Rush, Stupid, Winning

People want to complain. . . my point especially when it comes to racial humor is. . . we have that diversity, so I don't look at it like we are making fun of people, I look at it as how awesome is it that we can talk about this stuff, that we do have this kind of diversity, that we do live in a country that shows an array, unlike any other in the world.

Country, Fun, Humor, People, Point, World

I'm a spiritual person, I believe that if you read the bible, you get what you want from it. But, when you actually read it, you see the beauty, spirituality, the joy and love and what makes us godly. And then if you read between the lines of all the same books, you always see the human influence in the writing. . . it's not all about religiousness, it's about spirituality.

Beauty, Believe, Book, Joy, Spiritual, Writing
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