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[Ronald] Reagan had an agenda, three agenda items. George W. Bush had some. But [Donald] Trump, because people weren't listening, Trump has the longest agenda item list I have seen in modern American politics.

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Kinky Friedman

I just want Texas to be number one in something other than executions, toll roads and property taxes.

Number, Numbers, Texas, Toll, Tolls
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Money can buy you a fine dog, but only love can make him wag his tail.

Dog, Fine, Friendship, Make, Money

Poly means more than one, and ticks are bloodsucking parasites.

Bloodsucking, Mean, Parasites, Tick, Ticks

Golf is the only opportunity that middle-aged WASPs have to dress up like a pimp.

Dress, Golf, Like, Opportunity, Pimp

Musicians can run this state better than politicians. We won't get a lot done in the mornings, but we'll work late and be honest.

Funny, Morning, Mornings, Run, Running, Work

The main health hazard in the world today is people who don't love themselves.

Hazards, Health, People, Today, World
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