You see weird things driving. . . I've never understood log trucks. Sometimes you'll be out on the … - Brian Regan

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Quote of the day

I don't know why I got so lucky. I have to pinch myself often and say, 'Is this just a dream?'

Brian Regan

You see weird things driving. . . I've never understood log trucks. Sometimes you'll be out on the highway, you see two big giant trucks loaded up with logs, and they pass each other on the highway. . . I don't understand that. I mean, if they need logs over there. . . and they need 'em over there, you'd think a phone call would save 'em a whole lot of trouble.

Call, Mean, Phones, Thinking, Understand, Understood

Same Author Quotes

I hate the phrase “One thing led to another”. What kind of lazy writing is that? Isn't it your job as a writer to tell me how that made this happen? “Adolf Hitler was rejected as a young man in his application to an art school. One thing led to anotherand the United States ended up dropping two atomic bombs on the sovereign nation of Japan”.

Art, Hate, Jobs, Rejected, School, United

You know what's fun? You pick somebody at random, like out of the phone book, and send them about 100 'Just Because' cards. They can't even ask you why you did it.

Ask, Book, Fun, Phones

You can microwave a Pop Tart. That just blew me away that you could do that. How long does it take to toast a Pop Tart? A minute and a half if you want it dark? People don't have that kind of time? Listen, if you need to zap-fry your Pop Tarts before you head out the door, you might want to loosen up your schedule.

Dark, Doors, Listen, Long

They always say that Albert Einstein was a genius. Then how come when anyone ever calls you that, it's an insult? 'You don't know where you parked the car? Good job, Einstein. ' I don't think we're honoring that man properly by using his name in vain in parking lots.

Car, Honoring, Jobs, Men, Thinking, Vain

If reading makes you smart then how come when you read a book they have to put the title of the book on the top of every single page? Does anyone get halfway through a book, What the hell am I reading?

Book, Hell, Read, Reading, Smart