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On the analogy of 'Dictionary Johnson,' we call Fred R. Shapiro, editor of the just-published Yale Book of Quotations (well worth the $50 price), 'Quotationeer Shapiro. '. . . Shapiro does original research, earning his 1,067-page volume a place on the quotation shelf next to Bartlett's and Oxford's.

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Jon Stewart

It's nice to know that [God] can destroy us in a myriad of ways.

Destroy, God, Know, Knows, Nice, Way
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If it turns out that President Barack Obama can make a deal with the most intransigent, hard-line, unreasonable, totalitarian mullahs in the world but not with Republicans? Maybe he's not the problem.

America, Barack, Funny, Make, Maybe, Usa

The wisdom of the masses is not always wise. You could put a lot of things to a vote-you could have put anti-miscegenation laws to a vote, and that would have passed pretty handily. Either all people are created equal-or they're not. You're either buying into the original premise of America-or you're not.

America, Law, Passed, Vote, Wisdom, Wise

So Fox News is the voice of America and Obama is Stalin? Oh my God! I guess that makes me Yakov Smirnoff.

America, News, Smirnoff, Stalin, Voice

That's the Senate Ethics Committee, an oxymoron since 1973.

1973, Committee, Ethics, Oxymoron, Rolex

Must be nice to be a Republican senator sometimes, because you get the fun of breaking sh*t and the joy of complaining the sh*t you just broke doesn't work.

Broke, Complaining, Fun, Joy, Nice, Work
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