I never really paid attention to sales until the second record.
Modesty is my best quality.
Everything good that happened to me happened by accident.
I was going to buy my girl a Packard car for Christmas, but it took too long to deliver, so I bought her some handkerchiefs.
Try saving when your salary is low. So after making more money, you will not be able to do this anywhere
I'm an old newspaper-man myself, but I quit because I found there was no money in old newspapers.
When another comedian has a lousy show, I'm the first one to admit it.
It doesn't take me long to write songs.
I shall await the first shot, and if you do not batter us to pieces, we shall be starved out in a few days.
Remember, an easy question can have an easy answer. But a hard question must have a hard answer. And for the hardest questions of all, there may be no answer - except faith.
The problem of pornography is that it does not reveal too much of a woman but too little.