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You can't take your stuff with you when you die. That doesn't mean you shouldn't enjoy it while you're alive. Why not? But it's all pretty silly. I fall victim to it. I mean, I want nice stuff too. So I guess I'm poking fun at myself as well as other materialistic people.

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Mike Birbiglia

Failure's hard. There's no way around. Bombing on stage never feels great. You feel judged, you feel alone. But then when your performance works, it's transcendent.

Alone, Bombing, Hard, Judged, Performance, Stage
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I used to think I was a little unstable, and then I met every girl I've ever dated.

Dated, Girl, Littles, Met, Thinking, Used

I think if anything, the fact that it's popular right now makes me go: "Well, I guess I'm going to start doing something else then in the next few years. " I dunno, it almost feels hackneyed at this point. To start a premise by saying, "I did this awkward thing. " But then again, awkwardness and feeling alienated are always going to be a part of comedy. Alienation, I suppose, can't be hackneyed because it will always exist.

Thinking, Awkward, Feelings, Guess, Awkwardness, Premise

Saturday night is perfect for writers because other people have "plans.

Night, People, Perfect, Saturday, Writers

The key to eating healthy is not eating any food that has a TV commercial.

Keys, Healthy, Tvs, Eating, Food

What I really need is a woman who loves me for my money but doesn't understand math.

Funny, Humor, Math, Money, Understand, Woman
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