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With television, it's difficult to do some things. You have to shoot so many minutes a day, so you always have to be prepared or you won't be able to complete the number of pages that you have scheduled for that day.

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Frank Muir

The golden rule when reading the menu is, if you cannot pronounce it, you cannot afford it.

Golden, Menu, Menus, Pronounce, Reading
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Strategy is buying a bottle of fine wine when you take a lady out for dinner. Tactics is getting her to drink it.

Bottles, Dinner, Lady, Strategy, Tactics, Wine

The glances over cocktails That seem to be so sweet Don't seem quite so amorous Over Shredded Wheat

Amorous, Cooking, Food, Glances, Quite, Sweet

It has been said that a bride's attitude towards her betrothed can be summed up in three words: Aisle. Alter. Hymn.

Aisle, Betrothed, Funny, Love, Marriage, Towards

Hotel tea is when you have to mix together a plastic envelope containing too much sugar, a small plastic pot of something which is not milk but has curdled anyway, and a thin brown packet seemingly containing the ashes of a cremated mole.

Anyway, Hotel, Moles, Seemingly, Tea, Together

The speeches to be wary of are those that begin with I'm just going to say a few words.

Begin, Few Words, Speech, Speeches, Wary, Words
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