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When I start writing a poem, I don't think about models or about what anybody else in the world has done.

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Greg Proops

Contact lenses are for vain, weak-willed piglets who swan around showing off: 'Look everybody, I can see without spectacles. No one at first glance will ever assume I know how to surf the net. '

Firsts, Look, Piglet, Piglets, Surf, Swans
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If Iraq's weapons are weapons of mass destruction, surely ours are weapons of growth and nurturing.

Growth, Iraq, Mass Destruction, Nurturing, Weapons

Now, we're Americans. Technically, who is from this country? Only the Indians, who we graciously let dwell on their native casinos.

Country, Casinos, Native, Let, Technically, Graciously

Don't yell at people. Stand up for what's right. Put yourself in the other persons place. Respect women. Don't take no for an answer. Laugh at yourself. Don't believe what you are told. Fall in love.

Believe, Falling In Love, Laugh, Love, People, Place

If you want to live in 'white world,' if you want to experience the stultifying boredom and penetrating ennui that homogeneity can bring, you can go to Canada any day of the year. It's an entire country named Doug.

Country, Years, White, Live, Entire, Canada

Talking to the British about sex is like talking to Americans about reading. Nobody does it so why talk about it?

Like, Reading, Sex, Talk, Talking
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