Those things that are dearest to us have cost us the most.
At the Christmas party, the secretary with the long red hair ate three pickles, and four salesmen panicked.
A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours.
This man's wife told him, "For Christmas, surprise me. " On Christmas Eve he leaned over where she was sleeping and said, "Boo!"
A man is hit by a car while crossing a Beverly Hills street. A woman rushes to him and cradles his head in her lap, asking, Are you comfortable? The man answers, I make a nice living.
For every studen with a spark of brilliance, there are about ten with ignition trouble.
When I was in school, one of my teachers was crazy about me. I once heard her tell another teacher, "I wish he was my kid for one day!"
They can boo me, yell at me, and throw peanuts at me, as long as they pay to get in.
As we rise higher in the understanding of ourselves, the national and racial dissonances will be forgotten in the universal rhythms of Truth and Love
The people we've known the longest are often the people we know the least.
Being true to one's duty is a mark of true disciples of the Lord and the children of God. Be valiant in your duty. Stay in step. Do not fail in your most important task, that of keeping your second estate. Be true to your duty, for it will bring you to God.