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I do enjoy running down a ditch full of mud, firing bullets. It’s the way I am. I love it.

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Dana Gould

If anything, I believe that when I die, I will have to stand in front of all the children who went to bed hungry while I was on earth and read aloud a list of my eBay purchases. I shudder to think of it. Explaining to a poor child with a swollen belly why I didn't give his village fifty cents a week but spent twenty-seven dollars in a bidding war for a Mars Attacks coffee cup.

Children, Coffee, Hungry, Mars, Poor, War
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Does anyone remember how we used to get cash before ATM's? Did we have to go inside the bank? Then what? We lived like apes!

Apes, Atm, Cash, Doe, Lived, Used

There's something vaguely erotic about watching a woman eat a banana while cupping two plums.

Eat, Erotic, Plums, Two, Woman

Always remember, you don't stop shitting your pants because you grow old. You grow old because you stop shitting your pants.

Pants, Remember, Remember You, Remembers You, Stop

When you break life down, it's about 100% time management.

Break, Life, Management, Time, Time Management

Usually the people that peak in high school are tragic, tragic adults. Most of them end up working for the water department in their hometown and driving around said high school as the decades slip past.

Adults, Past, People, School, Tragic, Usually
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