The age of your children is a key factor in how quickly you are served in a restaurant. … - Erma Bombeck

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I admire Russell Simmons. He is a successful dude that has done a little bit of everything. He keeps it moving, and he's still doing things. Larry David is also amazing. He is honest and blunt. A creative genius.

Erma Bombeck

The age of your children is a key factor in how quickly you are served in a restaurant. We once had a waiter in Canada who said, "Could I get you your check?" and we answered, "How about the menu first?"

Answered, Baby, Canada, Children, Food, Restaurant

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When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me'.

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Sometimes I can't figure designers out. It's as if they flunked human anatomy.

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Time. It hangs heavy for the bored, eludes the busy, flies by the for young, and runs out for the aged.

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I don't think women outlive men, Doctor. It only seems longer.

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If I had my life to live over again, I would have waxed less and listened more. . . . I would have cried and laughed less while watching television. . . and more while watching real life. . . . But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute of it. . . look at it and really see it. . . try it on. . . live it. . . exhaust it. . . and never give the minute back until there was nothing left of it.

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