Jennifer ("Jen") Lancaster (born November 5, 1967) is an American author whose titles have appeared on the New York Times bestseller list. As of August 2015, she has twelve published books.
You think you're so cool just because you can walk!
I'm not lazy. I'm simply judicious about excess movement.
Quinn Cummings is a master story-teller and her book is nothing short of delightful. Her insights into topics like celebrity, parenting, and cats with a taste for homicide are pithy and uproarious and not to be missed. Notes from the Underwire is charming, hilarious, and just snarky enough to be ultimately satisfying.
I never sleep on the plane. I have to be awake and using my mind power to keep it in the air
In real life, I tend to yell at people a lot. Not because I'm bossy or mean, but because I'm frustrated.
For the record? I have never been her baby. In fact, I reject the notion of coming out of her body. I prefer to believe I was hatched, or perhaps purchased.
This is terrific! What fun! Maybe tomorrow I can go to the prom with my brother. The day after, perhaps I can wear white pants and unexpectedly get my period.
When did the cell phone become a license to be rude? And why must I be subjected to your personal conversations?
Were I forced to describe this woman in one word, that word would be. . . herpes.
I'm very detail oriented. I think that's why people enjoy my memoirs - because I tend to remember everything.
I still believe in the Holy Trinity, except now it's Target, Trader Joe's, and IKEA.
I can't believe anyone would voluntarily run 26 miles. Sometimes I sit on the couch cross-legged because I don't feel like walking to the bathroom.
The best thing about being 45 is not taking myself so seriously. Do I miss the package I came in at 25? I do. Gravity is no one's friend. Yet the perspective I've gained is so worth the wear and tear. What would have mortified me at 25 is now simply fodder for a funny, relatable story. Also? I was a waitress at 25, and now I'm an author. Forty-five is definitely better.
You know what it was like? It was like thinking I was heading to a surprise party and instead it was a surprise pap smear.
Seriously, our nation is never going to be on the same page on issues like gun control, welfare, the economy, the environment, etc. I doubt we'll ever come to terms on tastes great or less filling and hybrids versus Hummers, and there will always be Yankees fans and Red Sox fans, and never the 'twain shall meet. Fortunately, all it takes for us to be of one mind is some buttercream frosting.
No, it's not a 'corpse thing. ' I feel I lack the emotional capacity to deal with those in mourning.
As a reader, I notice political views regardless of whether or not the book is fiction. What annoys me is when said views do nothing to advance the narrative.
Ambien might have mentally just tossed my salad. WITH CROUTONS.
I think people tend to be very myopic and they dont understand how their actions impact others.
Expressing political opinion can be a powerful way to establish a character's voice when writing fiction.