Ambien might have mentally just tossed my salad. WITH CROUTONS. - Jen Lancaster

Same topic Authors

Quote of the day

It is well to give when asked, but it is better to give unasked, through understanding; and to the open-handed the search for one who shall receive is joy greater than giving.

Jen Lancaster

Ambien might have mentally just tossed my salad. WITH CROUTONS.

Ambien, Croûtons, Might, Salad, Tossed

Same Author Quotes

The best thing about being 45 is not taking myself so seriously. Do I miss the package I came in at 25? I do. Gravity is no one's friend. Yet the perspective I've gained is so worth the wear and tear. What would have mortified me at 25 is now simply fodder for a funny, relatable story. Also? I was a waitress at 25, and now I'm an author. Forty-five is definitely better.

Definitely, Missing, Package, Perspective, Seriously, Tears

I’m instantly mortified by my fat, uncontrollable mouth, but that’s when it occurs to me that my humor is a self-defense mechanism. Even though I may come off like a stark raving asshat, being funny is the most important tool I have to stay sane. The ability to say what I think is the key to allowing me to feel in control.

Instantly, Keys, Mouth, Self, Thinking, Uncontrollable

I'm the person who says every single thing she thinks, sometimes to others' amusement, and almost always to my detriment.

Amusement, Detriment, Says, Sometimes, Thinking, Thinks

No matter how happy anyone is with their choices, I believe it's human nature to wonder about the path not taken.

Believe, Choices, Happy, Taken, Wonder

I don't care how happily married you are or how deeply enmeshed you are with your children and family and career -- every woman needs a couple of chicks who'll break out the sangria just because you need to vent.

Careers, Children, Couple, Sangria

Similar Quotes

Willa Cather

If you love the good thing vitally, enough to give up for it all that one must give up, then you must hate the cheap thing just as hard. I tell you, there is such a thing as creative hate! “A contempt that drives you through fire, makes you risk everything and lose everything, makes you a long sight better than you ever knew you could be.

Cheap, Fire, Giving Up, Hate, Thing, Vitally

Martin Amis

The first thing that distinguishes a writer is that he is most alive when alone.

Alive, Alone, Distinguishes, Firsts, Thing, Writer

Brooklyn Decker

I'm named after a horse. My mom's best friend had a horse named Brooke, so my dad suggested 'Brooklyn' as a more formal version, and it just stuck - and now I live in Brooklyn part-time, so go figure.

Figure, Friendship, Horse, Live, Mom, Stuck

Khalil Gibran

It is well to give when asked, but it is better to give unasked, through understanding; and to the open-handed the search for one who shall receive is joy greater than giving.

Give, Giving, Joy, Understanding

Erwin Rommel

Messages can't be intercepted if they aren't sent, can they?

Ifs, Intercepted, Messages, Sent