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As far as the Animals breaking up - it was my fault. I wanted out. We took it to the max, as far as we could take it. Our reunion tour in 1983 went pretty good until we left America. Then we pushed it too hard and it fell apart.

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Scott Dikkers

That special bond you think you have with your pet is imaginary. As long as it has food and water, you could get hit by a train tomorrow, and your pet wouldn't think anything of it.

Animal, Long, Special, Think, Thinking, Water
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Be sure to lie to your kids about the benevolent, all-seeing Santa Claus. It will prepare them for an adulthood of believing in God.

Adulthood, Atheist, Believe, Believing, God, Lying

Statistically speaking, there is a 65 percent chance that the love of your life is having an affair. Be very suspicious.

Chance, Relationship, Romance, Speaking, Suspicious

A true friend is a gift from God. Since God doesn't exist, guess what? Neither do true friends.

Atheism, Atheist, Gift, God, True, True Friend

If your workplace was somehow transplanted into the jungle and everyone was forced to survive at a very primitive level, it's safe to say that eventually your boss would rape you.

Boss, Levels, Primitive, Safe, Say, Survive

Your pet is not your friend. It is your hostage.

Friend, Hostage, Pet
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