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There is no merit in being truthful when one is truthful by nature, or rather when one can be nothing else; it is a gift, like poetry or music. But it needs courage to be truthful after carefully considering the matter, unless a kind of pride is involved; for example, the man who says to himself, "I am ugly," and then says, "I am ugly" to his friends, lest they should think themselves the first to make the discovery.

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Dana Gould

The simple act of smiling at people makes the world a better place. Unless it's the day you decide to walk around with your dong out.

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Does anyone remember how we used to get cash before ATM's? Did we have to go inside the bank? Then what? We lived like apes!

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There's something vaguely erotic about watching a woman eat a banana while cupping two plums.

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Always remember, you don't stop shitting your pants because you grow old. You grow old because you stop shitting your pants.

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When you break life down, it's about 100% time management.

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Usually the people that peak in high school are tragic, tragic adults. Most of them end up working for the water department in their hometown and driving around said high school as the decades slip past.

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