A valuable qualification of a modern politician seems to be a capacity for concealing or explaining away the truth.
I have one last request. Don't use embalming fluid on me; I want to be stuffed with crab meat.
Eighty percent of success is showing up.
Even if God exists, he's done such a terrible job, it's a wonder people don't get together and file a class action suit against him.
Until you've been kissed on a rainy Parisian afternoon - you've never been kissed.
Bisexuality doubles your chances of a date on a Saturday night. I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it's fantastic. If there is reincarnation, I'd like to come back as Warren Beatty's fingertips. I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own. My love life is terrible. The last time I was inside a woman was when I visited the Statue of Liberty. Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it's a pretty good one.
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Every therapeutic cure, and still more, any awkward attempt to show the patient the truth, tears him from the cradle of his freedom from responsibility and must therefore reckon with the most vehement resistance.
How tragic that the very thing that could set us free-playing the fool-is the thing we will not do. When we're afraid to be fools, we end up being afraid to be anything.
We're constantly being told what other people think we are, and that's why it is so important to know yourself.
But the meaning of life is not. . . explained by one's business life, nor is the deep desire of the human heart answered by a bank account.