Can we pray for the reelection of George Bush?
Michele Bachmann says God made the earthquake and hurricane to punish us. Untrue - he made Michele Bachmann for that.
You can return all the Christmas gifts you want, but you will never get back the time spent with your relatives.
Cars will soon have the Internet on the dashboard. I worry that this will distract me from my texting.
A race between Perry and Christie would test whether Americans would rather be executed or eaten.
The only way to explain how some people dress for the airport is they think no one else will be there.
If you are friends with the wrong people, Google+ autocorrects them
I think I was in high school, actually, and it was a guidance counselor or someone said, you know, you're just too loud; like you need to just stop talking so much and stop being so opinionated; like no one wants to listen to you because you're really annoying. And I'm glad that I didn't shut up, because it seems like people are listening.
It's ludicrous that my friends in California aren't able to legally get married. It's a civil rights issue. In 20 years we're going to look back at tapes of these antigay people saying ridiculous things on the news and it's going to sound as antiquated as the newsreels of horrible racists from the '50s.
In fact, I think 500 years from now, the two Americans so far who will be remembered are George Washington and Neil Armstrong, who, amazingly hasn't been paid very much attention.
There's a terrible truth for many women in the picture business: Aging typically takes its toll and means fewer and less desirable roles.