I mean, I'm not hoping for the apes and the monolith. I'm hoping for controlled chaos to assist … - Jon Stewart

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The most dangerous thing in the world is to make a friend of an Englishman, because he'll come sleep in your closet rather than spend 10 shillings on a hotel.

Jon Stewart

I mean, I'm not hoping for the apes and the monolith. I'm hoping for controlled chaos to assist us.

Apes, Chaos, Mean, Monolith

Same Author Quotes

If it turns out that President Barack Obama can make a deal with the most intransigent, hard-line, unreasonable, totalitarian mullahs in the world but not with Republicans? Maybe he's not the problem.

America, Barack, Funny, Make, Maybe, Usa

The wisdom of the masses is not always wise. You could put a lot of things to a vote-you could have put anti-miscegenation laws to a vote, and that would have passed pretty handily. Either all people are created equal-or they're not. You're either buying into the original premise of America-or you're not.

America, Law, Passed, Vote, Wisdom, Wise

So Fox News is the voice of America and Obama is Stalin? Oh my God! I guess that makes me Yakov Smirnoff.

America, News, Smirnoff, Stalin, Voice

That's the Senate Ethics Committee, an oxymoron since 1973.

1973, Committee, Ethics, Oxymoron, Rolex

Must be nice to be a Republican senator sometimes, because you get the fun of breaking sh*t and the joy of complaining the sh*t you just broke doesn't work.

Broke, Complaining, Fun, Joy, Nice, Work

Similar Quotes

Alan Greenspan

People dont realize that we cannot forecast the future. What we can do is have probabilities of what causes what, but thats as far as we go. And Ive had a very successful career as a forecaster, starting in 1948 forward. The number of mistakes I have made are just awesome. There is no number large enough to account for that.

Careers, Enough, Mistake, People, Realize, Successful

Florence King

Recently while browsing in a secondhand bookstore I bought a paperback copy of The Intellectual and the City, but I was unable to read it. When I got home I discovered that the original owner had highlighted the entire book - literally. Every line on every page had been drawn through with a bright green Magic Marker. It was a terrifying example of a mind that had lost all power of discrimination.

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Dave Brubeck

After the Second World War, I returned to California to study composition with Darius Milhaud, who wrote wonderful works like 'Le Boeuf sur le Toit' and 'La Cretion du Monde. ' I especially enjoy his work for two pianos, 'Scaramouche.

California, Enjoy, Like, Pianos, Two, War

Charles Colson

The Bible has, amazingly- no doubt with supernatural grace-survived its critics. The harder tyrants try to eliminate it and skeptics dismiss it, the better read it becomes.

Dismiss, Doubt, Grace, Read, Supernatural, Tyrants

Truman Capote