I'm very loyal in a relationship. Any relationship. When I go out with my mom, I don't look … - Garry Shandling

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Quote of the day

My love runs by like a day in June, And he makes no friends of sorrows. He'll tread his galloping rigadoon In the pathway of the morrows. He'll live his days where the sunbeams start, Nor could storm or wind uproot him. My own dear love, he is all my heart, -- And I wish somebody'd shoot him.

Garry Shandling

I'm very loyal in a relationship. Any relationship. When I go out with my mom, I don't look at other moms and go, "I wonder what her macaroni and cheese tastes like. "

Looks, Loyalty, Mom, Moms, Tastes

Same Author Quotes

I met a new girl at a barbecue, very pretty, a blond I think. I don't know, her hair was on fire, and all she talked about was herself. You know these kind of girls: 'I'm hot. I'm on fire. Me, me, me. ' You know. 'Help me, put me out. ' Come on, could we talk about me just a little bit?

Barbecue, Girl, Hair, Selfish, Think, Thinking

Nice guys finish first. If you don't know that, then you don't know where the finish line is.

Finish, Guy, Guys, Know, Nice, Positive

My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don't really know me.

Friends, Friendship, Funny Friend, Intimacy, Love You, Tell

I remember learning to drive on my dad's lap. Did you guys ever do that? He'd work the brakes. I'd work the wheel. Then I went to take the driver's test and sat on the examiner's lap. I failed the exam. But he still writes to me. That's the really nice part.

Dad, Exam, Nice, Remember, Wheel, Writing

They should put expiration dates on clothing so we men will know when they go out of style.

Dates, Expiration, Funny, Know, Men, Style