Your mother won a special reward," she told me, "because everyone had a head in her pictures. We all applauded.
"And we'll call you. . . hmmm. Pudge. " "Huh?" "Pudge," the Colonel said. "Because you're skinny. It's called irony, Pudge. Heard of it? Now, let's go get some cigarettes and start this year off right. "