If only someone would do for cows what Bambi did for deer. Cows have been in films, but … - Paula Poundstone

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There is not the slightest indication that nuclear energy will ever be obtainable.

Paula Poundstone

If only someone would do for cows what Bambi did for deer. Cows have been in films, but they haven't starred. I'm still willing to eat a species that is only a supporting player.

Cows, Deer, Eat, Player, Supporting, Willing

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I like to work on New Year's Eve. It has a nice spirit; a nice feel about it. If you are all about the 'year-end' thing at all, then laughing with fellow human beings is a great way to start the new year.

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I think we need a 12-step group for non-stop talkers. We're going to call it On and On Anon.

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I'm the only person I know of who's ever been pulled over for attempted speeding.

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Gay Republicans, how exactly does that work? 'We disapprove of our own lifestyle. We beat ourselves up in parking lots.

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I was court-ordered to Alcoholics Anonymous on television. Pretty much blows the hell out of the second A, wouldn't you say?

Blow, Hell, Pretty, Television

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I'm one of these children who grew up at the knee of my grandmother and her elder sister, listening to very old people talk about their memories.

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Stop trying to fix your body. It was never broken.

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