Besides getting several paper cuts in the same day or receiving the news that someone in your family … - Daniel Handler

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I was sowing wild oats and doing the kind of things that you should do when you don't have kids. Now, I'm just doing less of that, but I earned it, you know. I feel like just spending quiet evenings with my wife and son and sitting in bed in the morning and watching him marvel over the curtains opening or whatever little thing. That all feels really good. And so, I've changed because I'm impressed.

Daniel Handler

Besides getting several paper cuts in the same day or receiving the news that someone in your family has betrayed you to your enemies, one of the most unpleasant experiences in life is a job interview.

Cutting, Enemy, Jobs, Life, Paper, Same

Same Author Quotes

Just because something is traditional is no reason to do it, of course. Piracy, for example, is a tradition that has been carried on for hundreds of years, but that doesn't mean we should all attack ships and steal their gold.

Gold, Hundreds, Mean, Steal, Traditional, Years

Dead women tell no tales. Sad men write them down.

Writing, Men, Tales, Down, Dead

It was darker than a pitch-black panther, covered in tar, eating black licorice at the very bottom of the deepest part of the Black Sea.

Black, Covered, Darker, Panthers, Sea

If I were to say, "Yes, I am a fascinating, erudite person," what would that say about me? I don't know.

Persons, Fascinating, Knows, Yes, Erudite

If an optimist had his left arm chewed off by an alligator, he might say in a pleasant and hopeful voice, "Well this isn't too bad, I don't have a left arm anymore but at least nobody will ever ask me if I'm left-handed or right-handed," but most of us would say something more along the lines of, "Aaaaaa! My arm! My arm!

Ask, Hopeful, Optimism, Say, Voice