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One cannot imagine St. Francis of Assisi talking about rights.

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Michael Showalter

I'm writing a memoir. I'm four pages in. I start with my first memory, which is kicking my uncle in the balls. I was four.

Four, Kicking, Memoir, Memories, Writing
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Maybe in 10 years,I'll only be doing "classical" comedy. Or crashing my car into trees.

Car, Classical, Comedy, Maybe, Tree

I like doing all different types of comedy - stand-up, sketch, movies, TV. I like to try everything.

Comedy, Different, Like, Trying, Types

Cats are unpredictable because they're wild and domestic at the same time. Watching a cat's behavior is like a small window into the wild.

Behavior, Cat, Time, Unpredictable, Window

I feel like marriage is a sacred institution that should only be between a man and a woman. If a gay couple wants to be married, why can't they just be satisfied with a civil union? Why do they have to get "married"?

Couple, Gay, Like, Marriage, Men

I'm not big on fat jokes. That's a little beneath me. I'm not a huge fan of making a joke completely at someone else's expense. Even though I think he does it better than anyone else, I don't love. . . Well, it's different with Sacha Baron Cohen, but that whole thing where you're "punking" people? I don't like that. I don't like doing it, and I don't particularly find it funny when the joke is on a person who doesn't know they're being set up.

Different, Making, Particularly, People, Sacha, Thinking
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