It is my belief no man ever understands quite his own artful dodges to escape from the grim shadow of self knowledge.
She's not here," I tell him. Buttercup hisses again. "She's not here. You can hiss all you like. You won't find Prim. " At her name, he perks up. Raises his flattened ears. Begins to meow hopefully. "Get out!" He dodges the pillow I throw at him. "Go away! There's nothing left for you here!" I start to shake, furious with him. "She's not coming back! She's never ever coming back here again!" I grab another pillow and get to my feet to improve my aim. Out of nowhere, the tears begin to pour down my cheeks. "She's dead, you stupid cat. She's dead.