Global consciousness is that thing responsible for deciding that pots containing decaffeinated coffee should be orange.
If you think that by threatening me you can get me to do what you want. . . well, that's where you're right. But - and I am only saying this because I care - there's a lot of decaffeinated brands on the market that are just as tasty as the real thing.
I hate decaffeinated coffee. It's useless brown water.