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Herb Caen Biography

Herbert Eugene "Herb" Caen (1916–1997) was a San Francisco journalist whose daily column of local goings-on and insider gossip, social and political happenings, painful puns and offbeat anecdotes—"a continuous love letter to San Francisco"—appeared in the San Francisco Chronicle for almost sixty years (excepting a relatively brief defection to The San Francisco Examiner) and made him a household name throughout the San Francisco Bay Area.

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Herb Caen Quotes

Best trumpet: Mike Vax, an alumnus of the Kenton Band, who plays every style with a bright cutting edge, throwing in bop riffs here and there.

Alumnus, Cutting, Mike, Play, Riffs, Style

A man begins cutting his wisdom teeth the first time he bites off more than he can chew.

Begins, Cutting, Men, Teeth, Wisdom

A city is not gauged by its length and width, but by the broadness of its vision and the height of its dreams.

Cities, Dream, Dreams, Length, Vision, Width

The waterfront without the Ferry Tower would be like a birthday cake without a candle.

Cake, Candle, Tower, Towers, Would Be

We (San Francisco) have football weather during baseball season, and baseball weather during football season.

Baseball, Football, Season, Weather

When a place advertises itself as 'World Famous,' you may be sure it isn't.

Advertises, May, Place, World, World Famous

It is better to have loved and lost, but only if you have a good attorney.

Lost, Loved And Lost, Attorney, Loved, Good

Philosophically, I don't like doing commercials.

Commercials, Like, Philosophically

Baffling late-life discovery: Golfers wear those awful clothes on purpose.

Awful, Clothes, Discovery, Golf, Purpose, Wear

I have a memory like an elephant. I remember every elephant I've ever met.

Elephants, Like, Memories, Memory, Remember

Logic is no answer to passion.

Answer, Answers, Logic, Passion

San Francisco isn't what it used to be, and it never was.

Humorous, San Francisco, Used

The only thing wrong with immortality is that it tends to go on forever.

Forever, Goes On, Immortality, Thing, Wrong

You cover Q-tips with sandpaper and ram them up your nostrils as far as they will go. Then you sniff talcum powder while shredding hundred dollar bills.

Dollar Bills, Dollars, Hundred, Ram, Rams, Sniff

All American cars are basically Chevrolets.

American, American Cars, Car, Cars, Chevrolet, Chevrolets

Satire of satire tends to be self-canceling, and deliberate shock tactics soon lose their ability to shock, especially when they're too deliberate.

Self, Tactics, Satire, Deliberate, Shock

One day if I do go to heaven. . . I'll look around and say, 'It ain't bad, but it ain't San Francisco.

Bad, Day, Heaven, One Day, San Francisco

The clock doesn?t matter in baseball.

Baseball, Clock, Matter

The world of Manhattan is small and tightly knit, and the man on top retains a certain humility. He knows how far and fast he can fall by looking at the guy across the street. The view from the $250,000 apartment covers a lot of ground, most of it condemned.

Apartment, Fall, Humility, Men, View

A good column is one that sells paper. It doesn't matter how beautifully it is written and how much you admire the author. . . if it doesn't sell any papers, it's not a good column. It's a terrible yardstick to use, but in the newspaper business, that's the whole thing.

Business, Matter, Paper, Terrible, Use

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