Stephen Grosz (born 1952) is a psychoanalyst and author.
Closure is just as delusive-it is the false hope that we can deaden our living grief.
I want to change, but not if it means changing.
Being present, whether with children, with friends, or even with oneself, is hard work. But isn't this attentiveness - the feeling that someone is trying to think about us - something we want more than praise?
When we cannot find a way of telling our story, our story tells us-we dream these stories, we develop symptoms, or we find ourselves acting in ways we don’t understand.
Psychoanalysts are fond of pointing out that the past is alive in the present. But the future is alive in the present too. The future is not some place we’re going to, but an idea in our mind now. It is something we’re creating, that in turn creates us. The future is a fantasy that shapes our present.
It is less painful, it turns out, to feel betrayed than to feel forgotten.
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